Monday 30 July 2007

Really Huge News embraces the summer silly season with in-depth analysis of key global issues. Admittedly in the swimming pool of investigative journalism Really Huge News is paddling in the shallow end of the baby and toddler section. So a brand new week and a look at a brand new country - Japan.

Ten important things to know about Japan:

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Puppy The World provides an essential dog rental service for those moments when you realise that walking a dog is the very thing missing from your world.

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Japan is the land of McVitie's purple digestive biscuit.

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Tokyo Metropolitan Central Wholesale Market is the biggest fish market in the world selling seafood at the rate of 2.2 million kilos per day and not a fish finger (fish stick for those of you in the USA) in sight. Having said that, Gorton's of Gloucester, the company that invented the fish finger, is now owned by Nippon Suisan Kaisha, Ltd.

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Cat lovers, frustrated at their inability to be pet owners due to the lack of space in modern Japanese apartment, can go to Cats Livin and spend an hour or two playing with the 18 or so cats on duty.


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Fugu chefs train for three years and pass rigorous written and practical tests before they are licensed to prepare this potentially lethal fish. The formal records state that 14 people died of blowfish poisoning between 2002 and 2006, similar to a major E.coli outbreak - what's your poison: fugu or hamburger?

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Japan has one vending machine for every twenty-three people. The range of products sold is vast with certain items achieving global notoriety. My favourites are the machines that dispense farm fresh eggs, live lobsters, french fries and rhinoceros beetles. My snack needs would be fully catered if I could only find that elusive fugu machine.

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Japan has given the world Karaoke but in a manner reminiscent of Cheddar cheese, the world now dominates Karaoke. It is the Finnish nation who run the Karaoke World Championship, the world karaoke record is held by 80,000 Finns who, overcome by Eurovision success, sang Hard Rock Hallelujah, and the patent for Karaoke machines is owned by a Filipino. In the meantime, the Japanese are happy singing their hearts out. Altogether now, "Lady in red ....".

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An urban myth is that post-war the Japanese modeled modern living on Hollywood films and that the lack of toilet scenes meant that this particular aspect of Japanese life lagged behind in the squat and pit days. Nowadays the Japanese are flushed with success. Their lavatories are the envy of the world whether they provide a heated sitting experience, the ultimate in cleansing arrangements or even medical sensors assessing blood sugar level, blood pressure or body fat content.

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The Japanese use 25 billion sets of chopsticks a year. My kids love Asian food and courtesy of an excellent Japanese restaurant in Oxford migrated to chopsticks with a little assistance - fold a small piece of paper a couple of times to create a slim paper wedge to put between the top of the chopsticks. Then wind a rubber band around the top of the chopsticks to hold them together and provide the ability to pinch the chopstick tips together. Kid friendly, trainer chopsticks. Fortunately for the environment, the Japanese do not use 25 billion rubber bands a year.

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Japanese golfers who achieve a hole in one are expected to throw a celebratory party and buy expensive presents for their caddy and fellow golfers. A bit more expensive than a round of drinks at the 19th hole. The prudent golfer, therefore, takes out hole in one insurance.

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